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The Art of Marriage


As a date night discussion guide


Helps husbands and wives discuss the purpose and challenges of marriage 


  • Schedule a dinner or coffee date.
  • Each spouse should listen to the 30-minute The Marriage You Always Wanted message by Pastor Jack Graham (available at
  • Each spouse should spend a few minutes writing down answers to the questions on the reverse side.  

During the Date 

  • Spend 15 minutes discussing your answers.
  • Each of you pray this brief prayer aloud…

    Father, give me the grace to treat (spouse’s name) as a gift from You and to become the gift You want me to be.

Affirming Your Spouse as God's Gift

What are some of the qualities that first attracted you to your spouse, or that you now appreciate? (Mark all that apply.) 

 □ Pays attention to detail
□ Remains calm in tense situations
□ Likes to have fun
□ Is well organized
□ Stays very focused on task
□ Loves spending time with people
□ Good at launching projects
□ Wants to work through disagreements
□ Expresses feelings well
□ Likes to talk
□ Looks good in jeans
□ Looks good out of jeans
□ Loves to be spontaneous
□ Can really throw a party
□ Gives generously
□ Seemed he/she would be great parent
□ Gives wise counsel
□ Is easy to please
□ Works hard
□ Other: _________________________

How Your Marriage Tells the Truth

Every marriage is intended to reflect the living reality of the gospel.  Check the ways you think your relationship tells the truth about God.  Circle items where your marriage may be vulnerable to the enemy of marriage.

□ Sacrificing for one another □ Two made one in physical intimacy
□ Each trying to meet the other’s needs
□ Forgiving one another
□ Open to the blessing of children
□ Giving love to children
□ Pleasing one another sexually
□ Faithful to marital vows
□ Intimate rather than isolated
□ Loving/cherishing one another
□ Honoring/respecting one another
Partners rather than competitors
□ Sharing laughter and fun
□ Other: _________________________

Each share one small step you can take to make your marriage a better picture of the gospel in the next 30 days

© 2011 Inkling Innovations & Family Life